Skip to content

Happiness Within Your Reach – Not So Far Away

By Janet Vargas - Inspirational Writer and Owner of this Website

Have you ever felt confused (emotionally) about happiness? Why don’t you experience it more often? How come it plays ‘hide n seek’ with you? Why does it seem so far away when you most need some?

I would like to express some thoughts with you about HAPPINESS – WHOLENESS and BALANCE. Seems everyone is after Happiness almost to the expense of experiencing  other emotions and being OK with them.  It kind of throws things out of balance and makes you feel off pretty quickly when you experience other emotions – the unpleasant ones tend to stay around longer (you get stuck) and you find it difficult to shift Modes.

The world makes us upset with ourselves if we’re not happy and we stop to analyze ourselves “Why is that? What’s wrong with me? Why aren’t I like other people who seemingly have it together? (they put on their best and don’t show their real side)”

Carolyne Leaf (a clinical neuroscientist) says “Happiness is knowing where we belong and knowing why we are alive, regardless of what is going on in our life. It is not so much a continuous smile as a state of being that includes moments of sadness, anger and unhappiness.” In other words, it is not the absence of them.

Happiness is a state of being where upsets and sad moments are allowed, not forbidden. You could say that happiness has a rest mode that takes things in it’s stride, not stopping to think what’s wrong if an outing or a day is not to our liking. It doesn’t say “this is not my day” if things are not going right – it does not feel threatened by a change of feelings because feelings are fickle. So often, they are not a true indication of where things are at or where they could be. So a happy state of being is not dependent on circumstances to be at peace and it does not need a quick fix happy joy experience to keep it alive. No, it doesn’t look for excitement all the time to feel at ease.

One feels more restful, more assured when unrealistic expectations are kept in check and we find the balance. This is possible for you, it is not out of the question and it all starts with adapting to a better outlook on Happiness.

Whereby you discover it’s a Happy Mode, instead of a ‘lucky dip’ thing that is highly dependent on what you get and what you do (those are unrealistic expectations). Yes happiness is more sure when it’s found within, not so much on without. True happiness affords more peace, more optimism and it knows the art of contentment. So many people respond poorly to the mention or thought mistaking it for something negative but true contentment affords more happiness – pretty much on a daily basis. I kid you not, more happy days are found with contentment than without and more readily sustained.

And what’s wrong with Happy Moments? There are many more of them if you’re not detaining yourself to an unhappy mode. If you don’t have much to be happy about, how about Happy Moments? They are more plentiful than days if your outlook/attitude is right. Oh yes, collecting them, so to speak – counting our blessings (big and small) can sometimes make you feel ten feet tall.

Let yourself experience a range of emotions – not being too extravagant about one or the other, the happy or the sad (overly excited or very upset) and you will find more peace of mind. People are often confused about happiness often, mistaking it for excitement and the absence of excitement. I think deep down everyone is looking for peace of mind, so they’re looking for something to give them a lift.

Settle it in your heart and mind, you’re not looking for happiness outside of you, it can be found within…………

It’s a Mode you live in. Switch it on each day until this way of life becomes part of you.

Really speaking, we need to experience a range of emotions – not just happiness. In this world are repetitive messages “happy, happy, happy…….get, get, get……buy, buy, buy” we’re expected to be at our best all the time, we’re programed by commercials to get, get, get and buy, buy, buy. TV ads and programs cause you to be discontent with your possessions, relationships and achievements. Even if you're happy with what you have, those commercials tell you "No, you're not happy until you get this or buy that" (so to speak).

No wonder most people are not in a happy frame of mind, with all that bombardment. So many people feel plain mixed up on the inside – consciously or otherwise. When you see those things for what they are, and start backing away from all that influence, you start to get somewhere.

For starters, one needs to start backing away from so much TV Time – viewing it so many hours is not healthy for your brain, your eyes or Family Time. That will actually ease the congestion of constant stimuli in your ‘Day and Evening’ overall, and free up some time you say you don’t (or ever) have to really relax, build up your relationships with loved ones by having some quality time together, doing things as a family or contacting friends if you are single. Maybe engage in a new interest – a hobby of some kind.

 This helps to bring you back the balance into your life/lives for better decision making etc whereby you can keep building some substance into your life/lives and you can start to feel like your house is a HOME, not just a residence where you live. Honestly, as you can see_ much of what is referred to as ‘The Norm’ these days is ‘Far From Normal’ and what I described is having a toll on people’s health and well-being.

Sometimes we need to distance ourselves from the usual run of things to find the inspiration for what we would really like to do. For instance, we’re not going to get ideas while sitting down watching TV at length or texting over cell phones and social media excessively – we need to have ‘Time-out’ for ideas to spark or come to mind.

In order to experience Wholeness as a person, we really do need to experience less artificial stimuli/environment like too much TV and Tech and open ourselves to new interests which are practical like a hobby of some kind, whatever, to discover ourselves again or maybe the first time if you were brought up in a TV and Tech environment.

Believe me when I say that you do not need to be a HAPPY PERSON so much as a WHOLE PERSON so you’re unthreatened by other emotions, you can manage them better in various circumstances instead of feeling hemmed in or crowded by them. You can see things in perspective – we are created to function better this way. We’re more flexible and adaptable instead of being at the mercy of “Happy or Unhappy”……….that theory hasn’t done us any favors. Our emotions become more rounded instead and we’re well-adjusted.

Friends, may I suggest to you “This is the way to be Happier People” not with the absence of other emotions but regardless. Good wishes to You and God bless!